a random thought about love...

Valentine's has just gone by a few days ago and i've been thinking lately, especially since i found, opened and read the card that someone gave to me for Valentine's 08. This card is special, the tone is was one of warmth and love, which now probably doesn't exist anymore, even then i can still remember that the same voice, name and face when i think about it, I've kept the card back in my drawer instead of throwing it out. However, complaining about lost friendships isn't the purpose of this post even though the hurt may still remain. Ironically, the song that's on my itunes playing is Tattoo by Jordin Sparks...

I concluded a few years back that love existed in many forms but the long short of it would be, loving someone is the choice to care and to set aside their inperfections and see the person for who they are on the sunny side of their personality. Breakups seem to be becoming quite common, furthermore, a family friend is probably going to get a divorce... Since the basis of love is caring about someone, in all friendly relationships there is love, from friendships, to husbands and wives, to immediate and extended families, to the point that the beloved my be even "spoilt". but that really is something else. it is because of "love" that someone can hurt you. This sounds strange but even in hate, there is still love. simply because one feels angered by another party's actions, furthermore, you still care about them, perhaps more than when you loved them, so their actions can hurt you, quite badly. I am reminded of this when someone i know "freaked out" when he heard his ex girlfriend had gotten with someone new. When a person is indifferent, this is when all love, and care has evaporated, therefore, whatever happens to the other party, or whatever he or she does, does not affect you anymore.

Once the point of indifference has been reached, reconciliating the relationship will be most difficult, if not impossible. my thought to this would be, cherish loved ones while they are still around, be it friends or family because one never knows if tomorrow the relationship will turn sour. Unlike milk, friendships do not have a an expiry date printed at the top of the carton or at the base of the bottle. However, i do wish that friendships would last forever, and believe that they can. Love while you can because you "can't" when they're physically gone. Can't meaning they aren't there for you to love.

To finish i will quote a primary school friend... With love comes hurt, if there was no love, there is no hurt; they come together, hand in hand.

being critical...

well, at the start of this month i won the in house race for the 2nd time in straight races... this time i cut it a lot closer than the last time but the conditions were very different... anyway... i trained yesterday and admittedly, i sailed horribly, it seemed to me that my boat was sort of stalling and felt underpowered yet i was still fighting to keep it flat while beating up to the first mark, yes there were waves and i tried to manage them but its been a while since i've sailed with such used to such steep waves on the course. It almost seemed impossible, furthermore the boat didn't seem to have that flow over the waves which other sailors have. I was sailing a radial and the wind wasn't terribly strong, maybe up to 12 knots towards the end of the day? perhaps i wasn't keying in on my sail settings quickly because i had just swapped all my lines end for end so that they wear out evenly.

I need serious help with my mark rounding technique and upwind sailing in choppy water, with strong current and medium wind. i want to feel the boat flowing or at least feel that I'm sailing quickly up wind... i think I'm so critical about my mark rounding especially at the leeward mark having watched some videos of Olympic sailors and watched some of the top sailors in Singapore sheeting in non stop as if its really easy, i know its going to be hard work, and countless sets of concentration curls but I'm ready for it, i think... and if there's a will, there's a way. well, at least I've got targets and having not sailed in choppy conditions, i conclude I'm out of rhythm... i think more reading and water time will help. anyway, Uncle Tony's been pushing me in the right directions and teaching me to protect my position after coming round the leeward mark while leading... i wonder why he's been doing this... its not as if I'm always first round the buoys... oh well... I'll just keep training... ah, routine's going to be studying, gym, church and sailing... I'm looking forward to the sailing season proper (:

to end on a super happy note, besides swapping all my lines end for end, I've got myself a new main sheet... its ORANGE... and white... haha! its 7mm and measures 15 meters long, this gives me lots of line to play about with when i'm going off-wind, allows me to attach the tail to the end of the toestrap so it doesnt tangle, runs through the blocks really nicely and is extremely light so the sail is able to move out quickly. however, there's only 1 downside, its not the most abrasion resistant line in the world, after sailing yesterday the bit hairy at the parts which experience the most abrasion on the ratchet block and at the tail end at the end boom block. but still, its a lovely piece of work... anyway, happy sailing !

sailing...

i've got a shirt from global culture... it says "sailing; Obsession; the act of getting really cold, really wet, going nowhere really fast and spending really large amounts of money" i do agree with the above especially since its the time of the year that i'm checking my boat. I've found i need a new universal joint on my acme fatso jr tiller, and probably a new 7mm mainsheet because this season, the 6mm has been making mincemeat out of my fingers and causing quite a lot of discomfort while sailing up wind in heavy air... well... i guess these are things that have to be done... but i'm happy, i'm sailing well this year, and am not doing too badly... (i just won the febuary in house race laser open class last weekend- haha) i'm looking forward to the weekend because i'm going sailing again... anyway a note from myself to myself: GET A NEW UNIVERSAL JOINT AND THE FUDGING MAINSHEET (14.5m)!

the card's still there and dad admired it the other day... well you probably know it but i enjoyed seeing you at CNY (: and no, i dont have a crush on you... haha!